I laughed so hard at work today. One of the girls in the office returned to her chair where she suddenly noticed that this chair didn’t appear to be her chair. Her chair, she recalled, was clean and newer looking whereas this chair had a dirty great stain creeping across most of the seat and a white substance covering a small portion of the black plastic around the front of it. She stood there examining the seat for a few minutes perplexed trying to figure out who the hell would have swapped their chair for hers. One particular person in the office would be the sort of person to pull a stunt like that – a quick examination of his chair showed this was not the case as his chair was black and not green. In fact out of all 30 chairs in the building the 8 chairs in our area are the only ones identical to hers.

Confirming our chairs were all still positioned at the correct height and back adjustment specific to our individual requirements the 3 of us sat there staring at Dirty Chair Girl. We decided she’d obviously just not noticed that while she’d not been there on a particular day someone must have spilled their coffee on that chair. The only way she could narrow this down was to check with the other woman who uses that desk on 2 days of the week.

I stood up and peered over her desk at the mucky stain.

“Do you think that’s coffee?” I asked.

“I DON”T KNOW” she gasped

“smell it”

“YOU SMELL IT”

“I’m not smelling it – your arse has been on it!” I laughed

At this point the four of us were in fits of laughter

“I mean, I like you and all that…. you’re a top bird an all but I draw the line at sniffing your chair”

It was around this point the rest of us being helpful trusting girls decided to write our names on our chairs just incase ours were liable to be involved in some sort of covert swappage operation later on. You gotta watch your back in the office these days.